Dream 4/16/22
I had parked outside an establishment to finish up my shopping at but walked to one next door, ya know like a strip mall. When I came out I somehow couldn’t find the first that I meant to finish with. So I went in another and asked for help but my aphasia kicked in and I couldn’t remember the name of the first. The people inside laughed, then went about their lives. I went to another sit down place this time. I saw some people I knew and sat with them. We caught up then I explained my situation. They too laughed and went about their meal. At this point I became panicked. Strangers wouldn’t help, friends wouldn’t help. There I was lost not more than 40 feet from where I needed to be. So I left and went into a bar like space, most were strangers but I knew two more personally here. I explained, they let tried to help me search but without the name and the ability to communicate, its was useless, so they went about their fun time. Someone suggested I call the cops for help. So I did, immediately he knew where my car was but when he told me I couldn’t hear him except for him saying I would get a ticket and a sobriety test upon arrival. More panicked, I started walking back to the store I had actually purchased something in knowing that was close. My phone was dying and instead of a store I found myself in a hospital. There I found another cop, who claimed they would help and disappeared. Next was someone I was once in a mental hospital with, she had her kids, was smiling, and there for her mother’s illness. I didn’t tell her anything, just granted her support and a hug. I wondered around looking for the female cop that said she would help with no avail. Back on the street it was getting late, my phone dead. A homeless man approached. He shared the safe street spaces that were near. I contested that I had a car I couldn’t find. He laughed and said me too as he walked away. I woke up with a heart coming out of my chest. I had asked for help but lacked the words that made it possible to help me. Ode to select mutism, aphasia, and solitude manifesting in nightmare form.
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