They dance around,

Each time I call it out;

Manipulating clear meanings.

They gate-keep services and time,

Even my pets’ basic needs,

All for their ego’s entitlement.

They measured me worthless,

Just as the government:

Disabled.

Unable to work.

~~~~~~~~~~

Yet they feel justified in judgements,

All their own.

Constantly passively informing me,

What they think I can tolerate,

Without a moment…

To hesitate,

Or speak to me,

Beyond the rumors they entertain.

Suddenly psychologists,

All around,

Doctors, veterinarians,

Baristas, cooks, servers…

————-

Even receptionists,

Will deny my rights,

Even to a name,

That allows me to have space,

To communicate.

Its as good as services denied,

Once the trauma turns my brain

To fight, flight, freeze…

Or more commonly fawn.

—————

What good is it to see a doctor,

If all I can say,

Is what he will want?

Where’s professionalism?

Out the door,

The moment they hear my ‘no’,

To their ableist actions.

How they enjoy their games,

As my body gets sicker,

And my mind incapable of speaking,

My thoughts sputtering out,

Disconnected abounds.

______________

They mock away,

In total disdain,

As if I am weak,

For caring for community…

Instead of they

For seeking someone

Already on the ground

Within their kick’s reach.

Seems clear to me,

Who needs healing and empathy:

Certainly isn’t me.

Nothing I do,

Can control my environment,

They choose my roll from birth,

Nothing I have ever done,

Has convinced any otherwise.

~~~~~~~~~~

No human has the capacity to stand

Solo.

So leave me alone,

Unless you want to grow space,

For accepting differences,

As I am glad to do,

With respect to you.